soft and provocative
My creative imagination is an orchard, yielding soft fruits ripened by a provocative sun.
Soft as in hope and optimism and care.
Provocative as in liberation and courage and erotic.
As in Jesus feeds Judas cherries, sucks the pits from his mouth…
As in Judas reaches up Jesus’s skirt…
As in sweat and tangle and cherry stems in hair and gasps and—
As in soft can be provocative. As in provoking can be soft.
As in orange slices and watermelon hunks and tart kiwi bites.
As in the softest, most provocative peach.
As in take a bite.
HOT HONEY MYCHAEL
Tell us about you, hot honey!
mychael zulauf
Baltimore, MD
mychael is a poet, publisher, and podcaster. he runs akinoga press, hosts so…poetry?, and is often preoccupied with birds.
All-time summer bop?
hoooo, starting out with possibly the most difficult question for me to answer. i often listen to music seasonally, so i actually just switched the playlists on my ipod over to more summer jams. i'll give you a handful:
Swamp Jam—The Mystick Krewe of Clearlight
Rock-N-Roll Pizzaria—Less Than Jake
Drown Me Out—Pity Sex
Today’s Sky is Clear—Parannoul
Everyone Needs an Editor—Mates of State
i could go on and on…
2024 summer bop?
since i just rediscovered them Lake Placid 1986—The Ivory Coast may be my permanent summer bop this year.
that, or Go—Flight Mode.
What’s a scent you love that you associate with summer? What does summer smell like?
-has to be freshly cut grass, or the damp-gray-air smell of right before a thunderstorm.
-a damp breeze thick with hibiscus and citrus. with maybe a hint of melon. and/or a spearmint snowball.
Beach read you have devoured this or past summer?
i don't really think they're beach reads, per se, but i just picked up a whole slew of Italo Calvino novels i'm excited to get in to. ESPECIALLY The Castle of Crossed Destinies (it's a whole sequence of vignettes told in tarot cards :-D).
Article of clothing or accessory you rewear all summer? Outfit you love? Anything about your summer style that the people should know?
hmm, at home, a pair of loose-fitting North Face shorts. i will likely be in sleeveless shirts and some manner of pant with the legs rolled up. but, i tend to avoid being outside during summer, so most people won't perceive my summer style/existence.
Which are you: A/C slut or sunkissed and sweaty slut?
100% A/C slut. i sweat a lot and so easily. summer is my least favorite season for EXACTLY that reason. i also have some long-standing body image issues, so not having the ability to layer is VERY frustrating.
Ultimate summer food/snack?
cantaloupe! ice cream sandwiches/bars, snowballs (obviously), and oddly enough, chili. ooooo!, and my chicken salad :-D
What can we not live without this summer?
i mean, i feel basic for saying this, but A/C. and thunderstorms. i need me some hefty rainfall.
Movie you watch every summer?
Hot Fuzz might just be that for me. i watched it a few weekends ago, and it felt right. maybe Jurassic Park? that feels like a good stormy summer night movie. OH FUCK HOW COULD I FORGET Summer Wars! That is a QUINTESSENTIAL summer movie.
Summer activity you have to do every year?
i'm honestly not sure i have one. though, i'm getting a tattoo this August, so maybe that?
Beach babe? Cabin cutie? Home honey? Road trip angel?
i think unfortunately home honey. i want to do more summer traveling, but it hasn't really been in the cards lately.
What gets you hot about summer?
i think the excuse to be as least-ly clothed as possible for *coughcough* legitimate reasons. but seriously, there's something really sexy about long evenings and fans blowing on exposed skin and lingering, lazy touches that become MUCH more intentional and motivated.
What’s a sweet-as-honey summer memory you hold?
throwing an end-of-summer/back-to-school pool party with a friend of mine. it was one of the few times i felt confident in myself and my body when i was younger. i felt like i could really just cut loose and not care about anything more than just having fun. aside from that night, i honestly can't remember the last time i felt that way.
How do you take your water in the summer?
in a BIG mason jar with as many ice cubes as i can possibly fit in there. or in my hydro flask with, again, as many ice cubes as i can POSSIBLY fit in it.
SMUTSCOPES: venus in leo
[I recommend reading for your rising and/or sun sign]
Aries
Ginger and ochre and copper and gold and paprika and terracotta and saffron and tangerine and apricot and marmalade and cooked carrot and flame and tango and
Taurus
Lay naked in the slits of sun dappling your sheets. Admire the shapes, the glow.
Gemini
Write down all dirty talk…then type up and email it to yr paramour the next day.
Cancer
Feed us your nectar…please??
Leo
Your strut IS the 2024 summer bop. *hits repeat*
Virgo
Sob sexy summer. Drink that sad salt. Replenish.
Libra
You smell like connection. Go to the gathering. Bring pie.
Scorpio
We are attentive, rapt. Tell us more.
Sagittarius
Be anonymous (and safe) at the dive in the town next door. Those butter yellow lights look good dripping all over you.
Capricorn
Ask for what you want. (Maybe the ask is the want.)
Aquarius
Write them a note. Have them meet you somewhere public. Make. Out. Let us watch…
Pisces
Work as in Work It. Squeeze lemons.
HOT HONEY HOL
Tell us about you, hot honey!
Hollin
Jessup, MD
Nature-ish mama and homebody. Cup filled by colorful flowers and a good yoga flow. Love my little family and happy, simple life.
What’s a scent you love that you associate with summer? What does summer smell like?
Honeysuckle, smell of the creek and dew on the morning grass. Summer dirt.
Beach read you have devoured this or past summer?
Iron flame by Rebecca Yarros. Devour is a strong word; in moments of quiet when the kids are in bed, I read a page or two and then pass out. Lol.
Article of clothing or accessory you rewear all summer? Outfit you love? Anything about your summer style that the people should know?
High-waisted jean shorts and my overalls. Pretty into my Birkenstocks still.
Which are you: A/C slut or sunkissed and sweaty slut?
The house is at a constant 68…
Ultimate summer food/snack?
Lightly salted lays chips. BLT.
What can we not live without this summer?
Sprinkler in the backyard.
Summer activity you have to do every year?
Vacation! Headed to the Great Smokey Mountains with the kids. 3-year-old and 1-year-old. Lowkey with no expectations. Got an Airbnb with an enclosed porch and a hot tub. Excited for mountain mornings with coffee on the porch.
Beach babe? Cabin cutie? Home honey? Road trip angel?
Cabin cutie.
What’s a sweet-as-honey memory you hold?
Charlotte (3-year-old) popping cherry tomatoes off the vine. Laying in the creek.
How do you take your water in the summer?
With mint leaves and cucumber!
VENUS WUZ HERE
[outfit of the week]
My outfit for Rosa’s Speakeasy in Fayetteville, WV! Rented this black plunge dress from nuuly (lined linen—a summer must). Styled with lavender eyeliner and my volute shell bolo tie, purchased from Vicious Circle Vintage.
Thanks to mychael and Hollin for their hot honey goodness. And to all of you for reading Queer Jesus. Until next week. <3
P.S. ICYMI, there’s a Hot Honey Summer playlist cooked up for your listening pleasure:
Very good smutscopes!
Love this! 🔥❤️